Wednesday, October 1, 2008

More Mentalkanth jokes....

Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Rajnikant

Rajnikant has counted to infinity - twice.

When Rajnikant does a pushup. He isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing earth down.

Rajnikant is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

Rajnikant doesn't wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

Rajnikant can slam a revolving door.

Rajnikant gave Mona Lisa that smile.

Rajnikant's house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.

Rajnikant grinds his coffee with his teeth and boiled the water with his own rage.

If you Google Search 'Rajnikant getting kicked'. you will generate zero results. It just doesn't happen.

It takes Rajnikant 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Rajnikant kicked one of the corners off.

There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq; Rajnikant lives in Chennai.

Rajnikant once ate and entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.

The only things that run faster and longer than Rajnikant are his films.

Rajnikant's every step creates a mini whirlwind. Hurricane Katrina was the result of a morning jog.

Where there is a will, there is a way. Where there is Rajnikant, there is no other way.

UPDATE: And more...for your enjoyment!
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1. Rajni keeps himself entertained out of concern for the public. If he gets bored, he'd yawn and the last time he yawned, it caused a tsunami.

2. Legend has it that Rajni was once a certainty in the Indian cricket team. As a bowler, Rajni usually needed 10 deliveries to finish the game. Owing to monotony, he retired from cricket as a 12 year old.

3. Tamil Nadu was dry one summer. Poor monsoons had resulted in a drought. But then this was only until Rajni sneezed! Bless him!

4. Wachowski brothers approached Rajni for "The Matrix". But Rajni was looking for more action.

5. In his younger days, Rajni ran the 100 mts in 6.7 seconds. He decided to participate in the Olympics only after another athelete broke the 7 second mark.

Well wait, Picture abhi baaki hai...

Here is an interesting new story.

Rajinikanth was bragging to Jayalalitha one day, "I know everyone there is to know.
Just name someone, anyone, and I know them."

Tired of his boasting, Jayalalitha called his bluff, "OK, Rajini how about Tom Cruise?"

"Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it" Rajini said.

So Rajini and Jayalalitha fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door, and sure enough, Tom Cruise shouts"Wassup! Great to see you! You and your friend come right in and join me for lunch!".

Although impressed, Jayalalitha is still skeptical.

After they leave Cruise's house, she tells Rajini that she thinks Rajini knowing Cruise was just lucky.
"No no, just name anyone else" Rajini says.
"President Bush", Jayalalitha quickly retorts.

"Yes", Rajini says, "I know him, let's fly out to Washington".
And off they go. At the White House, Bush spots Rajini on the tour and motions him , saying,"Rajini, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's have a cup of coffee first and catch up".

Well, Jayalalitha is very shaken by now, but still not totally convinced.After they leave the White House grounds, he implores her to name anyone else.

"The Pope," Jayalalitha replies.

"Sure!" says Rajini, "My folks are from Germany and I've known the Pope a long time".
So off they fly to Rome. Rajini and Jayalalitha are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Rajini says, "This will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people.Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope." And he disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican.

Sure enough, half an hour later Rajini emerges with the Pope on the balcony..
But by the time Rajini returns, he finds that Jayalalitha had a Heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics.Working his way to Jayalalitha's side, Rajini asks her, "What happened?" Jayalalitha looks up and says, "I was doing fine until you and the Pope came out on the balcony and the man next to me said,
'Who's that on the balcony with Rajini?' "

So dear folks, if you ever get the pleasure of serving Rajni a cup of coffee, see to it that it is clear of any seeds. Grind it!
And if you know of any other urban legends about Rajni, then post a comment here. Find It!

But always remember, never say never when you talk of Rajni(oops! I've used "never" twice in this sentence). Mind It!

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